Introspection

Trying to do right. God knows.

She had good intentions...oh well.

Six More Words

The home-cooked meal brought Reynolds home.

Crushed but Not Destroyed!

His gentle post-chemo snoring comforts me.

The Cross

Ressurection conquered death on the cross.

I am finding it hard to write posts - I'm not clever enough to think of witty/intelligent/meaningful/interesting posts on a regular basis. So I have challenged my self to this: write six words at least once a week - if not more - that tell a whole story. Ernest Hemmingway wrote this one:

For Sale: Baby shoes, never used.

Brilliant.

Paul will be helping me from time to time. Let's see how many minutes this resolve lasts.

What Sin?

Not too long ago, I was talking to a young man who felt his life was forever tainted because of some decisions he had made when he was 16. As he told me his story, I clenched my fists as the anger overwhelmed me. I was not furious at this young man, but rather at the married adult twice his age who enticed him to make these decisions. This person is a minister and a licensed counselor, for Pete's sake! Try as I might, I could not convince him to report this person even though there is now another young man who has taken his place. At least this one is of legal age. Small consolation.

I let the matter of reporting this person drop for the time being. This wasn't his most pressing issue. His issue was the overwhelming guilt he feels for his part in the affair. And so I told him my story - and I am telling you now - because maybe it will help you put your burden into perspective sooner than I did. I carried a tremendous burden of guilt for about 40 years. Forty years is a long time to carry around guilt as many of you may know. I am only 48.

In 2002...no, let's go further. In 1999, I was sitting in Roebuck Park Baptist Church listing to Bro. Bill preach his sermon in view of a call. For those of you who did not grow up Baptist, that means the congregation was "trying him out" to see if we liked his preaching enough to hire him. Bro. Bill preached a fine sermon about his plans for the church, the church model he planned to use, the area we would be moving the church to, and the prospects for going out and telling the neighbors about Jesus Christ. We call that witnessing. Well, Bro. Bill finished up his fine sermon and began to pray. That prayer at the end is to ask God's blessing, and to pray for people who don't know Jesus as their Lord and Savior to come to know Him right now. And so it was, during this prayer I prayed right along with the preacher for "them", the ones who needed to know Jesus. I was praying fervently for "them" with my head bowed, when I heard as clearly as if it were being spoken into my right ear, "You can't be My witness because you don't love and respect him." At that very moment, my eyes were opened and I was looking at my husband in the choir loft among 50 other people. I didn't look for him; my eyes were taken to him. I knew what my Heavenly Father was telling me was absolutely true. I began to cry with shame, but also with an utter loss as to how to fix my sin. But if God told me to fix it, I knew I had better.

I tried. I tried so hard. I grieved myself to sleep many, many nights praying for Paul to become a man I could love and respect. This went on for a year or more. It was a black cloud that hung over my head constantly. One day, walking down the hall at church with my little black cloud hanging particularly low, I passed Bro. Bill's wife. I don't know what made me do it, but I unloaded the story of God speaking to me and me looking at Paul. I told her about praying for Paul to change so I could love him. I told her I knew it sounded crazy to say that God had spoken to me, but that I was absolutely positive He had. He told Moses in Exodus, "Whether you turn to the right or the left I will be a voice in your ear saying, 'This is the way; walk in it.'" She listened, acknowledged that what I heard was Biblical, and asked me only one question. "Have you prayed for God to change you?" Me?!? Change me??? That very night, I quit praying for Paul to change, and began praying for God to change me, to change my heart. It was miraculous. As I changed my attitude towards Paul, he began to be kinder to me. Now those who know Paul know he is still a booger-bear at times. You should have known him then!

Now let's jump forward to somewhere around 2003. I was teaching a Sunday School lesson to a group of college girls. We were talking about correction and about how we should rejoice when God corrects us because the Bible says in Hebrews (12:5-6) "My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by Him. For the Lord disciplines the one He loves, and chastises every son whom He receives." I like to make the lessons real for the girls by sharing a piece of me with each lesson, so I shared the story that I just shared with you. At that moment, the Holy Spirit chose to enlighten me. I cried with joy! I realized at that very moment that God had not said to me, "You can't be my witness because of the terrible thing you did from the time you were 5," He said, "You can't be my witness because you don't love and respect him (Paul)." Do you see it? I had been begging God to forgive me for decades a sin He had forgiven me for decades ago when I asked Him to. He had removed that sin "as far as the east is from the west!" (Psalm 103:12) It was no more to Him. Only I had continued to hold on to that sin.

And so when I was talking to that young man the other night, I told him, and I tell you: if you believe in your heart that Jesus Christ is God's only Son who is the Way to eternal life, and you confess this with your mouth that He is the only One who can remove your sin, then you are a child of God. He is a Good and Gracious Father. If we come to our Heavenly Father and ask Him to forgive us for our sins, He is faithful to forgive our sins. He removes them. As far as the east is from the west. Forget the guilt. Forget the shame. It is forgiven. Period.

The trip was wonderful! Rich is Korean, so his mother and other women wore traditional Korean garb to the wedding. The picture of strangers below shows the style of dress, but Mrs. Chung's dress was a pretty aqua Lauren looked like a young blond Jackie Kennedy or something - she was beautiful. Calvary church was huge, old and stone; so, so beautiful. There were huge columns, and off to each side were ornate wooden doors that led to a sort of hallway that makes it less visible to walk around during the service.

Then there was the NYC Public Library. We got out of the first of three charter buses and saw a hundred or more glass vases with lit candles in them. Inside, the waiters were lined up with trays of drinks, and there was an open bar as well. The front table holds the wedding cake and around it are felted slats holding table assignments - alphabetically, of course - as if they are in a card catalogue...complete with a hole in the bottom of the card.

Up a few stairs on a landing, the Koreans were planning their second wedding. I sat on the steps above and watched that ceremony. Lauren and Rich came down the steps in traditional Korean wedding garb - her with her apron over her arms, and both carrying a duck. The ducks are used to represent the status of the marriage - bill to bill indicates harmony, and tail to tail indicates strife/trouble. They were placed on the table bill to bill, of course. Next, the couple bows then bows with their noses to the floor three times to the mother of the groom. A special wine is then poured by a helper and the couple touched the cup before it is passed to the mother to symbolize it is from them. Mama drinks to the couple and says a few words. After that, she reaches into bags filled with walnuts (girls) and dates (boys) and tosses them into the air. Rich holds out Lauren's apron and tries to catch as many as he can so that they will have many children. (5 dates and 4 walnuts were captured. The process is repeated with Lauren's parents, Becky and Jeff, and I think the total count was 35 children.) The bowing, wine drinking, and blessing ceremony is repeated with grandparents then the wine and blessing is repeated with siblings and cousins. Then Lauren and Rich bow to each other, drink wine, and a date is placed in Lauren's mouth. Rich takes the other end and they move lip to lip and bite it. Rich ended up with the seed which indicates he will have the power in the family. Finally, the groom's mother is carried on the groom's back for her last piggy back ride, bowing to the guests all around, and he then puts her down and takes up Lauren as his new responsibility. Just for fun, he gives Becky a piggy-back ride, too!

The ceremony is then over, and we move to the reception. We mingle a bit, enjoying oysters, individual chips and salsa, pate', etc., then the curtains are opened on the gigantic stone arches, and we are seated in the looonnnnnnnngggggg stone hallway, the Korean families mostly on one end and the others mostly on the other. At each place is an envelope like one would find at the back of a library book with a check out card tucked in with the guest's name on it. There was also a menu card in front of that. We were at table 7; Aaron and Ginger were at table 15. After a few minutes, Lauren and Rich reappear back in their wedding attire (I told her she was very fortunate - most women only get to wear their wedding gowns once!) The waiters file in with salads, and just like in the movies five waiters peel off to the other side of the table and when all are in place the 10 salads are simultaneously placed in front of the guests. The salad was some strange stringy but tasty something with pecans and dried cherries and a round of fried goat cheese. After this course, the plates are removed in the same manner. Next, new plates are delivered and bowls and platters of food are delivered to each table and we serve ourselves, family style. There was skirt steak and kimchee, blackened red snapper, braised collard greens, truffled mac and cheese, sesame sugar snap peas, fried rice with ?, and biscuits. We also had sweet tea. The caterer said he had never made anything that was on the menu - he had to scramble to find recipes. He did very well.

After dinner and speeches, we moved back to the large open area for dancing to a live band and wedding cake as the waiters moved through the room with cookies brought in from Cleveland, Tennessee (Lauren's favorite when she was growing up), little key lime pies, and something chocolate - like a little chocolate pie as well as flutes of champagne. Lauren and Rich danced to "Dancing in the Moonlight" and it was fun and wonderful. I finally got the four Foreman boys to get up and dance with their women, but only on the condition that I could get Paul to get up and dance - which I did. He started doing some weird dancing he calls a buck and wing (like clogging) and everyone there circles around and watches. I think he did it at Rachel's wedding, too. Soon, Lauren joined in and everyone was hooting and hollering. Chris Foreman declared Paul his hero and all four Foreman boys got up and danced. Paul, of course, was done in after that, so we went back to the hotel.

thirty-five degrees

enchanted weekend wedding

Rich, Lauren...thank you!

Fish

New Beginnings?

Well, where have I been for over a month? The day-to-day, mundane stuff of life, I guess. School has started back and may be over soon - for me, anyway. Sigh. God's will be done. Who knows what plans He has for me? So tomorrow I will get out of bed at 7ish, get dressed , ride my little blue scooter to school, and teach my classes as usual as I wait to hear from my rep whether or not I am still a teacher, or if the last ten years were just a mirage leading to something better. I am okay with either because I believe with my whole heart God is in control of the situation.

God promised to say
'This is the way, walk in it;'
I believe He will.

To Helen (&) Back

Back home, peeling, and completely satisfied with our trip. Gary and Andrea were tons of fun to travel with, as were their daughters Tiffany and Ginger, and Tiffany's daughter Nichole, our son Aaron, and Patrick...we haven't decided who he really belongs to, but he's fun, too. We stayed in a really nice "cabin" on Dach Brucken Gasse in Helen. There is a killer turn when you leave the neighborhood, and if you promise not to tell my father, I will tell you that I dropped the scooter on that turn once. I had already made that turn one time perfectly. That second time, Paul was on his scooter, and Gary and Nicole were on Gary's scooter, and Andrea, Patrick and Tiffany were in the car. I headed down the hill to the first turn, made that right turn, then down a steeper hill to the next turn in the road to the left, and blew it. I knew it was a tough turn. I slowed down. I even came to a complete stop when I saw that I was not going to make it through without going into the shallow, rock filled ditch. The stop was too abrupt, though, so when I put my feet down I lost my balance and fell. The scooter fell, too, but it didn't turn off. I ended up with minor bruises - one on my left leg, one on my right ankle, and a knot on my right upper arm. I banged my head on the rocks and scratched my helmet. I laughed. The instant the panic was over I became aware that as I lay there on my back my feet were straight up in the air! I was really quite comical. I am completely blessed that it wasn't any worse!

The rest of the trip (we did end up trailering our scooters, by the way) I scootered without any problems. It really was a lot of fun riding those mountain roads. Some of them are not banked properly (like that awful turn where I fell), and they were a bit challenging, but other than that it was so much fun. Everyone went tubing Saturday except for Paul and I. I have been tubing there when the water is low and it really isn't that much fun to me. So Paul and I spent hours at the waterpark riding the lazy river while they spent four hours trying to get down their river bed. I feel certain we had more fun than they did, and I certainly got more sun. By the way, it rained Saturday night/Sunday morning, and the river was up so the same four hour trip took one hour on Sunday. And Saturday's ride wasn't without it's moments; they say Tiffany's spill out of her tube was quite entertaining!


Here's the burning question from the weekend: what in the world happened to Hansel and Gretel's candy? I love their fudge, usually, but this time it was as if they left out half the cocoa to save money or something. I hate it. they usually have such good fudge. Several of us got candy there - all different kinds - and none of it was anything to write home about. Too, too bad.

Another highlight of the trip (besides Tiffany's tube-turnover) was grubbing for gems at a place just outside of Helen. Paul and I split a $30 bucket of rocks and found a sapphire, two small emeralds, three small rubies and tons of semi-precious rocks like amethysts, citrine, tiger eye, jade, and the most beautiful of all, sodalite. It was like coke-bottle green and blue with purple sandwiched in the middle. So gorgeous, but they won't cut it anymore because it is too soft. I got the sapphire cut, though, and it should arrive in a few weeks. I haven't decided how to get it set - a ring? a necklace? - it is exciting to explore the possibilities. Aaron, Ginger, and Tiffany each got a tiger eye cut, and Ginger got a citrine cut that is going to be stunning! Nicole got something, too, but for the life of me I can't remember... amythest? In any case, it will be so much fun to get our jewels in the mail!

We rode our scooters back beginning Monday morning. The first leg was to Cave Spring, GA. What a wonderful ride that was weaving up and down mountain roads! We left early enough that it was cool, and rode fast enough to keep the heat off even as it got later in the day. We stopped four or five times for water, and only one time for gas. It was not a tiring trip at all. Oh, sure, our bumblies were a little numbly when we arrived, but not so much that we were sore later. We stayed at the historic Tumlin House as we had planned (thank goodness! since I don't believe there was a hotel in the town!) I am including pictures of the house and one of several house cats. The couple that owns the house was friendly, as were the other couple staying the night there on their way to Kentucky. Paul and I played dominoes and cards on a wonderful back porch, and opted not to swim in the tempting pool out back since the evening had already cooled. They had sleep-number-type mattresses on their beautiful antique beds which were made with antique (?) bedspreads. They had dozens of DVDs to choose from in the dining room, so Paul and I helped ourselves to some movies we haven't seen and nestled into that big bed. Our room had a restroom in it, but there are rooms without and for them there is a nice big bathroom midway up the stairs. I am sorry we don't have inside pictures because it was so lovely, but the camera batteries died. You can still see the charm on the outside, though. Look at those huge porches with two or three wicker swings. I really would like to curl up in one and stay for a while, enjoying the cool shade and a good book. I am afraid I would be tempted to sleep out there if allowed!
After leaving the Tumlin House, we went to see the cave spring from which Cave Spring gets its name. There were people there getting hundreds of gallons of water to take home with them. They say this is the clearest water in the entire state of GA. Can you believe we didn't have even a cup to put water in? We went to the general store to buy one, but it was still closed. I really do highly recommend this little town for someone who is looking for some true R&R.

Below left, you can see the folks getting enough water for an aeon. The entrance to the cave was locked so we didn't get to go in, but here is the view, on the right.


Can you believe how clear thewater is? Those are trout in there; can you see them?

The rest of the journey home flew by. We traveled all small highways and byways. Can you believe Paul and I didn't even have one real argument? Okay, I admit it, I was peeved when we just flew by the Tate House without even so much as a pause to admire it; but that was as bad as it got. We found out on the way home that our precious little long-haired, dapple Dachhaund was in need of semi-urgent medical care following what we think was a snake bite, so we did rush a little from Oneonta to Oak Grove. She had to have surgery to remove necrotic tissue from her muscle on her back leg, but she is home again and resting on her "throne."

So, now it is time for the Haiku. Hmmm. Let's see.

Mountains masked in mist
Steep roadways rise and descend
Helen on my mind

I am so looking forward to the end of this week when I head to Helen, GA. I am a little apprehensive, too, as I wonder about the trip there and back and the elements that might beat down on us. I am thinking about the possibility of trailering the scooters there, then riding them back. Any thoughts from anyone else on the subject?

Oh! I almost forgot the haiku at the end!

Trailering the scoots

Seems like ducking out in fear

Common sense wins out.

I am so bummed out. I only got 68 mpg on my scoot this time. It is still good, I guess.

Drove to Hoover and back this evening. I don't think I particularly like going 50-60 mph in the dark. Especially with amber glasses on. The glare is too much, the bugs hurt like a big dog, and I am not as confident that I can be seen. Think I will try to hold my scooting to daylight hours.

Dark, cool, windy night

Bugs, like snow, fall in the light

Can you see me now?

Brrrrr! Cold Alabama Nights

What on earth? Why is it so cold in Alabama right now? We had to cut our scooter rides short tonight because we weren't dressed warmly enough. Plus we are really tired. I did tell you that my husband is old, and I am practically getting ready to just about start getting old.

purple sunset clouds

decorate the evening sky

ohmygosh, it's cold!

Don't you just love riding in the evening? I do. I love when the air gets a tidge cool and the scents of nature waft past...wonderful! We just did a little jaunt into town to eat tonight. The food was good, but a bit too pricey...three meat and three's was almost $30! Sheesh! It's like riding together is bringing my family closer. I love that!

two scooters, two bikes

five friends head on a mission:

water Becky's plants

Our first adventure

Paul, my 57 year old husband, finally bought a scooter, so we immediately set out on an adventure. It required a lot of discussion, of course, just as the purchase of his scooter required much deliberation. Motorcycle or scooter? Which motorcycle? A big one like a cruiser? A lighter one like my son's Honda Shadow Spirit 750? Oh My Gosh! Just make up your mind and quit talking about it!

What won him over was riding my People S 250 home one night. He had been riding my Schwinn Graduate 150 just to see if he could stand to motate on 2 wheels. When we switched scooters that night and I rode my Schwinn again, I realized why he was hung up on buying a motorcycle rather than a scooter. It is tiny, and much like riding a sardine can on small wheels with a pretend engine...well, in comparison to the much stronger, larger wheeled People S 250. Once Paul rode my People he had to get his own People. Now we both have People. (I crack me up.)

Anyway, the big adventure.

We drove from Oak Grove in western Jefferson County, near Birmingham, AL, to Centreville, AL. This was well over 100 miles by the time we passed Centreville to get to Jimmie's BarBQue and then drove back to Centreville again. Jimmie's wasn't our original goal, but since we were both tired of being pelted by the rain we opted for his place over Big Girl BarBQue which was 5-10 miles further - no one really seemed to know how much further for sure. It's delicious bbq, found about halfway between Centreville and Prattville on Hwy 82.

Lessons learned on our first big adventure:

• Always carry a long sleeved shirt and long pants
• Always have a neck gaiter, because 70 degrees/6:30 a.m./foggy/60 miles per hour = dadgum cold
• Carry ibuprofen in your seat when you are traveling that far.
• Stop often
• One hundred miles is a long dadgum way to go in a day on a scooter
• Riding gloves would be nice, even in the summer
• Have one extra day's worth of prescription medicine in a keychain pill bottle just in case.
• If you are traveling with an old man who goes to sleep at 9:30, be sure you bring something to do

So we did all this driving down to Jimmie's and back to Centreville under partly cloudy skies. The partly cloudy sky became an angry purple, fully clouded sky with equally angry wind, so we decided to find a motel for the night. Thank goodness for the Windwood Inn! Can you believe in that little town we found a spotless American-owned room for about $50 bucks? We were amazed. As we ate our ice cream treats from the neighboring DQ, we decided 100 miles was a good rule of thumb for adventures to remain fun. Of course, we could go farther, but at what expense to our tender buttocks?

Mileage average: 70mpg+

Here's a link to the Inn (so I can find it again!)

http://www.trails.com/all-hotels/points-of-interest.asp?poi=65368

partly cloudy skies
full of possibilities
on the first trip south